The Day Our Lives Changed...

It was 4 pm on Friday afternoon, and I heard the garage door go up and my husband, in his loud car, drive in. The door opened, and I looked up from my position on the floor with my 10-week old son.  My husband looked like he had just been hit by a bus.

"What happened?" I asked. "Are you okay? Did you get fired?"

He could only simply nod.

Now, this may be a strange conversation to have, but we had joked around in the past that Tyler would get fired because of his strong opinions. But the relationship he had with his boss was very transparent. He felt comfortable sharing his opinions and thoughts with his boss because that's the type of relationship they had built.

But 8-weeks prior to this conversation, my husband got a new boss. He was still on paternity leave, and he wasn't sure what to expect when he headed back into his office to meet his new boss.

The department was headed in a different direction, and they didn't feel that he could be of use to them.

Okay, so that was that. And that is why my husband came home at 4 pm on that Friday afternoon.  Once I figured out what had happened, I calmly said, "Okay, it will be alright. We will be fine. God is not surprised by this."

I have no idea why I was so calm and not freaked out that I had a 10-WEEK OLD BABY and my husband didn't have a job. But I was at peace. Things would be okay. The Lord was in that conversation that day. He was not surprised by any of this.

It's not about what you know. It's about who you know.

That sentence is so true, and it came to be helpful as Tyler started trying to sort through the rubble and find a clear direction. He texted an old buddy of his, and he contacted the recruiter for the company that he worked for. What do you know? He had an interview the next week and a job offer all within a week and a half of him losing his job.

The Lord was in that conversation that day. He was not surprised by any of this.

Flash forward a couple of months. COVID-19 became a real thing and his company started telling people to work from home. We are so grateful that he was able to do so. But we also started re-evaluating our priorities. We once thought we would be living in Oklahoma for the rest of our lives. We thought that Tyler would be with his previous employer for a long time. We thought a lot of things, and suddenly, we realized they didn't have to be.

So Tyler asked me why we were still in Oklahoma. I was caught completely off guard by this question. He's known that it was my deepest desire to move back home to be closer to family. As we talked about it, we made plans to move back to Missouri sometime within the year. We had a goal to be moved by Christmas. He started sending me links to homes that were for sale. They had the address of Joplin or Carthage. What?! We had always talked about moving back to Springfield. I had always assumed that we would move to Springfield. Our parents assumed that we would move to Springfield.

But God was already in this situation. He wasn't surprised by any of this. And He had a plan greater than our own.

We learned how quickly the houses were moving as we watched my brother and sister-in-law try to find a home to purchase. So while we were still looking to look, we knew that we would have to act quickly if we wanted to put an offer in on something we loved.  We had an amazing realtor who wasn't just our realtor, but our "coach" as well. We talked a lot of strategy because we also had a home to sell in Oklahoma City.  Homes were moving so quickly, we weren't sure sellers would accept a contingent offer. So we had to be approved for a second mortgage.  Now...if there's anything to throw up over, it's the amount of money that you can be approved to borrow. It makes me sick to my stomach. But we were approved, and we quickly made an offer on a home in a very desirable neighborhood OVER FACETIME.

God wasn't surprised by any of this. But we sure were!

The waiting game to buy a home is the longest process ever. The packing process of your current home with a 1-year old will age you about 10 years. But thankfully, my in-laws came to help and my dad flew down for a day to help load the truck. We are so thankful for the help! I'll spare you the crazy details that ensued the day before we were to leave with our loaded truck. We were supposed to close on a Friday and it didn't happen. So we were homeless for the third time of our marriage.

Once again...not a surprise to God!

The night we pulled into Joplin, I cried happy tears. My dream was coming to fruition. We were immediately met with my uncle, three of my cousins, my brother (who lives 3 streets down, by the way), and my parents. They helped us unload our truck, and I just thanked the Lord for this very situation.

As we have now been here one month, I still haven't been able to process it all. We finally have an accepted offer on our Oklahoma home, and we will be able to close that chapter soon. But to be here...somewhere that I didn't see living--ever--is the greatest gift.

Family is so important, and something that I haven't had in the first year of Henry's life is help when I need it. So as I navigate what that looks like--because if I can be honest, it's hard for me to ask for help--I will be trying to soak it all in.

We didn't see this life change coming. We really thought we would live in Oklahoma for the rest of our lives. But God knew what would happen next. He knew that one huge life-altering event would domino effect the rest of these decisions. I'm so grateful to be close to my family and my friends. I'm grateful that cousins will get to know each other. I'm grateful for the opportunity to be here with a renewed heart and mind after being gone for 9 years. I'm thankful for the lessons I've learned along the way. And this isn't something that I ever want to take for granted. But most importantly, I'm thankful for a God who is sovereign and unchanging. He is faithful and good...no matter the circumstances.

She is Free Spotlight: Jorie

In January, I promised myself to get back to blogging regularly. It's an outlet for me, and I feel like I can work through a lot of emotions by writing.

However, today's emotion isn't hard....it's easy. And it's happy!

This year, I really want to take some time to spotlight the ladies that are working hard in the She is Free Studio. They have decided to make the investment in their health and have experienced inside-out transformation. God is really working in the lives of these women, and I'm excited to share their stories with you.

This month, I want to introduce you to Jorie. She took on the workout program that has 100 workouts in it, called Morning Meltdown 100. I asked her a few questions, and I want to allow you to listen in on our conversation.

Before you started working out with Beachbody On Demand, what were your hesitations and how were you feeling?

Jorie: Honestly, I hated working out. I hated the feeling of getting out of breath (still not really a fan of that! Haha!) and it just seemed daunting. Like it would take forever to see or feel any changes. I’ve started other workout stuff before but never finished....I’d miss a few days or it’d be the same thing over & over and I would just lose all momentum so I’d give up. But I felt “blah”. I wasn’t happy at all with how I felt, lack of energy, strength, endurance, etc. I was tired constantly and never felt

like playing with my kids if it took a lot of energy.

What made you want to do Morning Meltdown 100?

Jorie: I really liked that it was a variation of workouts. If it’s the same exact thing every single day, I get bored and quit. And to be honest, I needed something “big” to kick myself into action. I’ve never done anything close to 100 workouts...[I like to remind Beth that when I joined BOD, I asked her for basically the easiest program there was]....and I really wanted to challenge myself. I was tired of being tired. I wanted a change.

What kept you going?

Jorie: Part of what kept me going is that I’m stubborn. Once I started, I wanted to prove to myself I could actually do it! But also, I was amazed at how quickly I started to feel better and stronger and just more energy all around, so I wanted to keep at it for sure! Really though, the biggest motivation was the accountability group Beth started for it! There were MANY days I had no motivation to continue but those girls kept showing up and kept ME wanting to show up! I could not have done it without them!

What are you most proud of?

Jorie: The fact that I actually did it! So many days it was a mental fight to push play, but I knew I needed to do it. For myself, for my health, for my family....and some days you just have to do it even when the motivation isn’t there at all!

How do you feel now?

Jorie: I wouldn’t say I absolutely LOVE working out, but I enjoy it so much more than I ever thought I would! It’s become a stress reliever, a place I can clear my head. It makes me rely on God so much more to be my strength, especially on those days I’m not feeling it at all, because without HIM I couldn’t do any of this! I feel stronger than I ever have before in my life, healthier than I ever have before and I have energy and strength to enjoy my kids, have fun with them, play with them and carry them all over the place.

What have been your results?

Jorie: I didn’t lose much weight, and that was a huge mental thing I had to get over. We have become SO trained in this society to care about numbers and only numbers....please know that I’m not discrediting weight loss. Obviously, a healthy weight is extremely important! But I have spent so many years obsessed with that and only that. I would do whatever it took to get those numbers to drop, even extremely unhealthy choices. The weight would drop but I wasn’t healthy. So, this program did more for me mentally than I could’ve ever even imagined. I finally broke those chains of an obsession with numbers. I was losing inches and gaining strength. I KNEW I was getting healthier even if the scale didn’t drop. I knew I was building muscle!

I dropped a total of 7 inches ~ 4 of those inches were my waist! My clothes fit better and more comfortable and they fit in a HEALTHY way for the first time in my life and that motivates me more than anything else to keep going! I want my kids to see a model of healthy. True health, not what society says is health. I want my daughter to see that strong IS healthy. Strong IS beautiful. And strong and healthy is honoring to God as we learn to take care of the bodies He has blessed us with!

I’ve moved on to a new program now and am excited to see my health journey continue! Thank you, Beth, for being an amazing coach. For helping me, challenging me, encouraging me, motivating me and believing in me! I could NOT have taken that first step without you! Thank you for walking this journey with me!

Coach Note:

I am extremely proud of this girl. She has become such a wonderful friend to me. And to think that we met through Instagram! How crazy is that? To see how the Lord is working in her life--breaking the chains--and to see her walking in that freedom is truly incredible and an answered prayer! I truly cannot wait to see how He keeps transforming her as she walks in His Light!

Henry's Birth Story

On Monday, August 12^th, I went in for my 39-week appointment.  My doctor asked me if she had done a membrane sweep the last week, to which I replied, “No.” She asked me if I wanted it done, and I said, “Go ahead. We’re ready to meet this baby.”

I had only heard about this, but knew that it could possibly get labor started. We were two days away from his due date, so I wasn’t worried about anything.  At this point, I was still only 1 cm and 70% effaced.

The next day, I went to Aldi to get some groceries. I really didn’t know if I should be planning anything elaborate, but let’s just be honest…the last few months of pregnancy left me unmotivated in the kitchen.  I did buy a lot of things that had a long shelf-life, so I knew that if I did go into labor, the food would still be good.

That afternoon, I realized that I needed to text Kaitlin, our doula, to let her know my progress.  That was around 4 pm on Tuesday, and about 15 minutes later, the contractions started.  I was laying on the couch and realized that I had a couple contractions within a good amount of time.  I decided to start timing them.

At 4:47 pm, I texted Tyler to let him know that I was having contractions.  But I told him not to get too excited because they were 11-12 minutes apart.  Around 6:40 pm, I sent another text to Kaitlin, letting her know that I was having contractions and they were about 7-minutes apart.  She told me to rest up—which I had planned to do in early labor.

Resting was difficult.  I continued to sit on the couch, and then I eventually moved to my bed in hopes to get a little bit of sleep.  However, sleep didn’t come.  I moved back out to the couch so that Tyler could get some sleep, although, I’m not sure how much he got either.  My contractions were 8-10 minutes apart all night at a minute long.

Tyler took the day off, and his work decided that he was going to start his leave on that day. They cut all his communication. So he was stuck at home with his laboring wife. HA! I knew that I still needed to take my 40-week pregnancy picture, so I had him take it, which I'm sure was comical. We had to wait through a couple of contractions to finally get one that didn't look like I was in pain.  

I texted Kaitlin back and forth all day.  She was such a wealth of knowledge, and it was comforting to know that she was there to help us as needed.

She was going to come over to the house when my contractions were about 5:14 apart, but then they slowed again to 7-minutes. It was like that all day long.  They’d speed up, then slow down. She gave me a little workout circuit to try, and I got a little relief from the pain, but not a ton.

In the early afternoon, they really started to get painful. Like really painful. I was having to close my eyes, grit my teeth, cry, kick and scream…whatever it took to get through them.  Kaitlin was there for the ride…encouraging me and supporting me along the way.

She called me around 5:15 that evening to see how I was doing and how I was getting through the contractions.  She told me to give it a couple more hours before we head to the hospital.  Honestly, I didn’t know if I’d make it a couple more hours.  I had been walking around my kitchen and living room for hours just to cope.

I texted her around 6:15 and told her we were getting ready to head to the hospital.  I wasn’t sure how much more I could take.  The contractions were SO strong and some of them were 2-minutes long.

The ride to the hospital was awful.  I’m so thankful it was only 10-minutes away. I had to literally lay my seat back to get through some of the contractions—sitting was so difficult.  When we got to the hospital, Tyler dropped me off at the front door. I went and checked in.  They had me give a urine sample, and while trying to do so, I had THREE contractions. The nurse had to knock on the door to make sure I was okay. Evidently, they’ve had women try to give birth in there.  I would have found that funny, but I was in a lot of pain.

They hooked me up to the NST machine to watch my contractions, progression, and the baby’s heart rate. I had some of the worst contractions while sitting on that bed.  I was only 3 cm dilated, which was somewhat discouraging. Tyler was texting with Kaitlin at this point, and she thought they would just send me home.

I was literally praying that I would be admitted because if they sent me home, I wasn’t sure how I was going to get through the pain.  God answered my prayer because Henry’s heart rate kept dipping and they weren’t sure what it was.  They kept monitoring me, and during the awful contractions, his heart rate continued to dip.  They weren’t sure if it was because his head was being squeezed or if it was the placenta malfunctioning. They checked me again, and as they did, it sent me into another horrible contraction.

They called in the on-call doctor (by the way, my doctor’s office is on the second floor of the women’s hospital, so I knew there would be someone there), and she started talking gibberish at this point. I honestly didn’t know what she was saying, but the words “induce,” “Pitocin,” and “emergency c-section” were all mentioned. I know that she just had to cover all her bases, but it was somewhat scary.

Kaitlin had arrived at the hospital at that point. She was the only one who had a good head on her shoulders and could understand what was going on.  At one point, Tyler had left the room and it was just Kaitlin and me. She knew that our plan was to have the baby and then call our parents after he had arrived. I was in tears at this point and she asked me if she thought we should call our parents and let them know what was going on. I told her that there were a couple of points that I did just want my mom.

Tyler got back to the room, and they decided to admit me. We walked over to my labor and delivery room, and the nurse was getting me hooked up to the machines again.  Another nurse was in there, trying to start my IV, but apparently, I have small veins. Who knew? She stuck me 4 or 5 times just trying to get the IV in. I’ve never been stuck that many times before, but I’ve also never had to be in the hospital. I do give blood regularly, and I have never had any problem with them sticking me in the arm, but trying to get it in my hand was a different story. She ended up putting the IV in my arm for the night.

Around 12:30 am, Kaitlin, Tyler, and I were all discussing my options to get an epidural. I was 90% sure going into this birth that I would be getting it.  At this point, I was 300% positive that I needed it. So Kaitlin asked for me, as I was literally giving it all I could to get through my contractions. The anesthesiologist came in around 1:30 am and took his sweet time putting it in.  However, as soon as he got it in, I had immediate relief.

Once the commotion died down in my room, Kaitlin told me to rest. She was telling me that she thought getting an epidural would allow my body to rest and do what it’s supposed to do. She went home to get a little bit of sleep and to be able to take her kiddo to school the next morning. Tyler and I were able to get some small naps here and there.  The nurse kept coming it to try to reposition me, and let me tell you—it is SO weird not to be able to feel your legs. She literally had to push me over to get me to change sides.

But our little Herbie was a stinker. He did NOT like the different positions he was being put in. He only liked it when I was laying on my right side.  At one point, the nurse came back in because his heart rate kept dipping and they couldn’t figure out why. But I was still oblivious to how serious this could have been.

At 7 am, the nurse came in with a doctor—not my doctor. This doctor explained that my doctor usually takes Thursday mornings to be with her boys at home and she rounds on my doctor’s patients. She also explained that my doctor does this with her patients on a different day. I thought that was kind!

The nurse checked me once again, and I was finally 100% effaced and dilated to a 6! Hallelujah! My body was doing exactly what it needed to be doing! The doctor broke my water, and Tyler texted Kaitlin to let her know what was going on! She responded pretty excitedly!

Kaitlin got back to the hospital around 8:30 that morning, and we were just playing the waiting game. They were still trying to position me differently, but Herbie wasn’t liking it. So I continued to lay on my right side.

Around 10, the nurse checked me again and she surprisingly said I was at a 9.  Everyone was very excited, because they thought that they would need to start me on Pitocin that morning. Thankfully, I didn’t need it.

The nurse started to make preparations, and so many thoughts were going through my mind. I couldn’t believe that this moment was already here.  At this point, Tyler went inside his shell. He knew what was coming, so he found a chair by my head and sat in it.

When I was 10 cm, the nurse had me start pushing. Kaitlin was such a wonderful cheerleader, giving me tips along the way. I mean, I had no idea what I was doing. I pushed for 20 minutes or so, and then the nurse called all of the people that needed to be in the room to prepare for our birth. She even got ahold of my doctor who did indeed make it in time to deliver Henry.

At 12:05 pm of August 15th, after just about 44 hours of labor and 45 minutes of pushing, our little Henry Calvin was born.  I will never forget the moment I looked into his eyes. I literally couldn’t say anything and just started crying.  I looked over at Tyler and he also had tears in his eyes.  We had done it. Henry was here. I got to cut the cord, which was so cool. And Tyler announced his name to the entire room, since we hadn’t shared it with anyone.

It was fun to call our parents and siblings to share the news. Our parents made the trek down, and my best friend (who's also my sister from another mister) came as a surprise to us! I was so glad to have her there. <3 

Diane was sick that day, so I don't have a picture of her with Henry at the hospital.

Going home!

He was so tiny in his carseat!

Introducing Scout to his new brother!

Kaitlin, our doula, came over about a week after Henry was born for a little postpartum meeting. I was so thankful for her, and I will definitely hire her again for our next kiddo! 

We love our little Henry so much!!