Tuesday, July 2, 2013

My Story

While my mom was here last weekend, we talked a lot about food and lifestyle changes.
Mom and I struggle with some of the same things, so having someone to talk to who knows what my situation is like is really encouraging.

{I love finally having a friendship with her.
She doesn't treat me like a kid anymore...she treats me as an equal.
Sure, I know she's still my mom, but she also respects me as adult.}

Getting to talk with her about healthy decisions was refreshing.
Some people just don't understand where I'm coming from and what I have to do for myself.

I do a lot of my own research because:
1.  I need to be informed.
2.  I have to make decisions based on what is best for me.
3.  What works for the "norm," doesn't usually work for me.

I thought I'd share my "fitness and health story" with you today.
I want to be vulnerable and honest with you...I pray that I can encourage someone.


Growing up, I rode the bus to school.
Living 10 miles north of town, my parents didn't see the need to take us to school everyday.
The bus was free.

In third grade, there were 2 older boys (who were brothers) that made fun of me.
It wasn't the normal picking on kids.
It was hurtful and impacted me for the rest of my life.
I was called "fat" for 9 whole months.
To an 8 year old, that seems like eternity.
I would come home crying to my mom about it.
Nothing was done about it, but the damage was already done.

I had begun to really believe what those boys told me.
When you're told the same thing for 9 months, why wouldn't you believe it?
It was ingrained in my mind.
Never did I know the effects that it would have on me as a teenager and even an adult.
My mom would sit with me and tell me the Truth.
I was beautiful, made in my God's own image.

Yes, I've always been "overweight" by doctors standards.
Those dumb BMI charts are not even accurate.
It doesn't take into account your body structure...
...and I have tree trunks for legs (lucky for me, they are all muscle).

Anyhow, in high school I was into sports.
I was still self-conscious about my body, especially because I was a cheerleader.
I was not the typical skinny cheerleader.
I absolutely hated the spandex uniforms that we had to wear to cheer camp.
Hated them.
My junior year uniform was a little different than the other girls because I had to order a bigger size.
It didn't help that certain family members (on both sides) gave me their genes for well endowed assets. Ha.
So of course I was self-conscious.


Then my freshman year of college came, and I definitely gained the "freshman 20."
I had to go to the doctor back home for some reason unrelated to my health, and the first thing he said to me when he came into the room was, "You need to lose weight," and handed me papers about eating healthy.
I cried all the way home and was taking it out on my mom (which I should not have done).
I told her that I was never going back to see him, and I never did {and still haven't}.

Between my freshman and sophomore years of college, I was a SOAR Leader (orientation for the incoming freshmen).
I was friends with a girl from Hong Kong and we basically hung out all summer together.
She wanted to start working out at the YMCA, and I told her I'd go with her.
We got student passes (woohoo!) and went together.

A couple weeks later, I had decided to use their scale at the Y and weighed myself.
I was surprised to see that I had already lost 10 pounds!
That was the point in my life that I needed because from there on out, I knew that I could lose weight.

When school started back up, I used the workout facility on campus.
I worked out every day for an hour or two.
I went on to lose 28 pounds, but in October of that year, I hurt my back.
I hurt my back so bad that I took hydrocodone to get through my classes (they were only an hour long).
When I got out of class, I went straight to my residence hall and into my bed.
I could not stand or sit very long without having excruciating pain.
I stopped working out halfway through October.
The doctors didn't find out what was wrong with me until December.
And it was my chiropractor who figured it out.
But I never went back to working out like I had been before.

Shortly after, my boyfriend asked me to marry him {which was 3 years ago today!}.
I said, "Yes!"
I wanted to lose some weight before the wedding, but my accounting and planning got in the way.
I gained 20 pounds in the first year we were married.
The first year was crazy in itself, as we lived in 3 different cities.
So working out and eating healthy wasn't in the plan or even on my radar.


During our time in Oklahoma City, I turned to instagram to fulfill my need of having friends.
This may sound super weird to you {unless you are one of those friends}.
However, they have been a great sense of encouragement to me.
I've loved getting to know some of these wonderful ladies.

In April, I really started to think about getting on a fitness regimen.
A couple of my IG friends had started to turn their life around with their eating and that just really made an impact on me.
I hope to share with you at a later date what I've been researching and the decisions that I've made for me regarding health, food, and fitness.

But making these healthy choices now, isn't just for me.
It's for my future family.
**And before I go any further, let me clarify that we hope it will be a few more years before that happens (so you can quit asking ). ;)**
I want to be the healthiest that I can be for my future kids and for my husband.
I have to really want it, to do it.
And I do want it.
I want to make it my lifestyle.

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price.Therefore honor God with your body.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20

I would encourage you to also read this article.
Such great encouragement in how I want to raise my kids.

1 comment:

  1. Beth, I love this blog. It's very open and creative at the same time. I feel some of your pain of "older brothers'" constant belittling and growing up with a skewed self image. I remember my brothers *oink*ing every time i walked into the kitchen and sayings like, "No, the dress doesn't make you look fat, your FAT makes you look fat." I especially understand the limitations of chronic back pain that always gets in the way of life goals. I'm proud of you! Lifestyle changes are very hard and take lots of commitment and perseverance. Don't let hiccups discourage you. It's a life long path with bends and bumps in the road. And as I and so many other girls need to always remind ourselves, we ARE beautiful, for so much more than what's on the outside.
    ~Ruth Benthin


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