Sunday, August 19, 2012

The Last Chapter

Today I'm grieving.
I'm grieving the last chapter of my life.
No, not the last chapter.
Rather, the one I just closed.

Today was on-campus worship with the campus ministry that I was involved with in college.
I'm sad because I've gone to that worship service since I was in 6th or 7th grade.
My brothers and my mom were there.
My dad had to stay home and teach Sunday School.
I'm sad.

Is it okay to grieve the life that I had before I grew up and entered "Big Girl World?"
Is it okay to miss my college years where I had so much fun?
So many memories?
Is it okay to grieve the city where my heart has been left?
Well, even if it's not okay, I still am.

I'm trying to make life good here in STL.
It's hard.
I know God never said life would be easy, and I'm trying to suck it up.

But it's amazing how God works.
I heard a sermon at church this morning.
It was exactly what I needed to hear.
Sometimes when you're asking God for something, maybe you need to start seeking answers. 

So maybe it's time to start looking for another job.
Maybe it's time to let my tears out.

And when I finally did, my husband knew exactly the thing to cheer me up.
He went to get supper.
Then we watched "The Princess Diaries."
My favorite movie. Ever.
I'm so thankful God placed Tyler in my life.
He is my soulmate. 

While I'm sad today, I know it's just
For a little while.
One day there will be no more tears.

For now, I shall start my job search over again.

1 comment:

  1. i share your grief... but over other things... some similar things as well, its a long story lol as it always is with me. to add to it, i miss you very much. i so enjoyed seeing pictures and reading about your anniversary trip! i got red roses and an evening out to a really nice restaurant for my 2-month anniversary. did i mention that i miss you??? hope your job search goes well, i will be praying for you. love, kenz

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